Friday, December 17, 2010

Peak floooows.

The other night when I was in the ER one of the things they sent me home with was (another) peak flow measuring thingy. 

For those of you not familiar with this, which I'm guessing is most, if not all, even my fellow asthmatics, it's basically this gizmo that measures your breathing output. Basically you take in a really deep breath, or as much as you can, and then breathe out as hard and as fast as you can into this thing. The idea behind it is that more than taking deep breaths, asthmatics have difficulty expelling all the air from their lungs. So say the scientists anyway. All I know is I have trouble breathing. Period. 

You're suppose to do it regularly, daily actually, and it works kind of like a heads up on when your asthma is getting bad, before it actually gets really bad. Had I used it regularly, I probably wouldn't have ended up in the ER. 

And since I'm sure you're wondering, my normal peak flow is around 600, when I was in the ER it was 475 and this morning before using my inhaler, I was down to 450. 

They come in all shapes and sizes, but it just so happens that the one the ER gave me was this one

Pause. Take it in. Do you see what I see?

I find it rather curious that this is a) uhh.. how do I say this politely.. okay, there really isn't a way, it is indeed penis shaped. It's penis shaped. And, second, you blow into it. Really hard. As hard as you can. 


There's something wrong and completely inappropriate about this. 

I'm 100% positive that it was created by a guy. 100% positive. 


JB said...


-Lizmaster B said...


I'm here for you!